It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
Randomize
