I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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