I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
We have started to decorate penises.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
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