dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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