I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Randomize
