it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
