i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize
