Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
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He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
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Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
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