Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
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