i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
Randomize