I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Randomize