No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
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