....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
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