Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
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