i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
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