We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Randomize
