No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
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