so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
