I hope my margaritas pass through security.
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
whose parrot is this?
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
Randomize
