Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
stop calling my apartment porn island.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
