We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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