I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
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