She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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