time to smoke my breakfast
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
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bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
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So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
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