Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
