How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
