I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I would ride that face into the sunset
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Randomize
