Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
Two words: nipple clamps
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