I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
it glows. i had to have it.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
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