getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
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