i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Your christmas gifts are already wrapped, how on top of my shit am I?
I'm hungover as fuck and had to break into my own house by throwing a cinder block through my back door at 4am. You're more on top of your shit than me.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
