its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize
