omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
Randomize
