Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
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