im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
Randomize