Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

(914): View more from New York

you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped

Fav 23 7250 1381
share tweet
(650): View more from California

You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.

Fav 14 5921 1360
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(907): View more from Alaska

My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.

Fav 11 3596 1248
share tweet
(617): View more from Massachusetts

Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.

Fav 10 1182 2395
share tweet
27 Unforgettable Hookup Texts
Read it at the TFLN blog
(+44): View more from United Kingdom

You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.

Fav 2 2181 935
share tweet
(216): View more from Ohio

I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair

Fav 6 964 1774
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(520): View more from Arizona

Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away

Fav 1 1803 838
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(719): View more from Colorado

Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.

Fav 5 1785 756
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(920): View more from Wisconsin

Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.

Fav 0 4 26
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT