Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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