I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
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