You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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