I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again