Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
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