this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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