I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Randomize