dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
