Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize