You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
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