Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
Randomize