wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦ðŸ¼â€â™€ï¸
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize