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i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
be right there i have to get my cape
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Randomize
