your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future