Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
Randomize
